Wow. I don't know where to start, or really that there is a beginning.
There is merely a forward motion of progress; no apparent start and no apparent end. And so, this is the way, it would seem, life goes.
So be it. And what, exaclty, you ask... is that supposed to mean exactly? Not a huge deal. In some kind of optimistic way, though, it means that life goes on. Which it does. Funny thing is, that's the nature of life, isn't it? And yet God has organised it that way. Day in.. day out. Sun rises, sun sets. Seasons come and go.
Yes. Right now, I am meandering. So, shall I get the the point?
My title. If the above didn't exactly make much sense, I'll skip the waffle and give an interpretation, in, well, English.
So much has happened in my life over the past 3+ weeks. I've been busy, away, absolutely flat-out and sometimes bored out of my brain. (That was 3 weeks ago, home alone... )
As I stated abive, I never really know where or when, or how to start. Especially now, now that God has done something incredible in my life.
I suppose I'll go back to where I left off from my last post here, and a quick fill-in of what's been happening in this crazy mad life of mine. Most importantly, God has been changing me, and teaching me, and healing me. That last one is just something completely indescribable, the finality of finally being able to discard of these old wounds and burdens and be finally able to live alive - at last. I do not merely speak of my physical illness/ess and the healing which I have slowly been receiving from the Father for these (and praise His holy name) but rather of the deep, inner and crippling wounds I have carried about on the inside of me for as long as I can remember. As it stands, I am also convinced that physical illness as was in my case was only a very small glimpse of the turmoil that was going on inside me.
My body at last, did weaken from the inside calamity and began to show as a physical illness. I truly believe that many physical conditions are only expressions of what is really going on inside - as it eventually has to get out somewhere. In many ways, it is a mercy it has happened to me now, that I am able to see and recognise these things which have been suffocating and hindering me for so long - and by God's incredible grace they have been revealed to me.
With that said, I can only say I am finally, at long last really beginning to truly understand (as if a mere human could) the incredible healing of God, the trueness of it, the freedom which can now be grasped, and the hope alighted. I know I will never be the same again, my Lord has touched me more than I ever thought possible, and has set my very world ablaze. Not in some crazy, wild, uncontrollable or childish manner, but in a way so deep, so hidden within me, so tangible, so true, it simply is. He is in me, He has healed me.
Does it not say in the Bible, 'come, and tell of the wonders He has done'? I used to think that was all very well - for others, and for truly miraculous circumstances. But not only is our God a God of miracles, He is a God of everyday miracles, of the little things, so concerned with changing our hearts and ensuring we know how much (or get a glimpse of) just how incredible and never-ending is His love.
With that thought in mind, I will end here, but do return, for you shall find me ever changed by the Grace of our Lord, and it even surprises me (who has had a close walk with God) to discover just how much I keep talking of what He has done - and in a genuine, real, way - as one who has experienced the depths of darkness and has been brought back into life and light! And O what glorious, real, saving light that is!
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